The CVCA server has enough data (250+ GB) that it has become difficult to back up. Backups are taking 8-24 hours to complete, depending on technology. So, after dumping $2000+ into various solutions, the next attempt was to install a firewire 800 card in the server and use that to back things up. How hard can installing a PCI card be?

Uber-technician takes the server offline just before 7:00 am. He unhooks the 10,000 cables and hoists the 800-pound server onto the workbench. The side just pops off (good Dell!). Uber-tech takes out the not-fast-enough USB2 card that was last month’s solution to the backup issues. Uber-tech installs the new card. Success! Uber tech slaps the side back on, hoists the 800-pound server back into place, and reconnects the 10,000 cables. Uber-tech confidently powers the server back up. Wild success! Uber-tech goes over to his desk to await the “found new hardware” announcement. Silence. Hmmmmm. Uber-tech figures that the server just found the card and happily hooks up a firewire 800 drive. Silence. Hmmmmmm. Uber-tech remembers seeing a standard power connector on the card. Even though the manual says nothing about the power, uber-tech figures maybe the card needs 12 volts.

Adequate-tech unhooks the 11,000 cables from the server and moves the 900-pound server over to the workbench. Adequate-tech takes off the side. Hmmmmm. The only internal power cable seems to be powering the server DVD drive. Hmmmmm. Adequate-tech figures he can just share a network DVD drive, so he unhooks the power from the DVD drive and plugs it into the card. The card connection bends to the rousing chorus of “Oh, crap!” from adequate-tech.

Grumpy-tech pulls out the firewire 800 card and installs a second one (grumpy tech’s motto – “Always order two!”). Grumpy-tech hooks up the power connection. Success! Grumpy-tech puts the side back on the server and moves the 900-pound server back to the rack and hooks up the 11,000 cables. He powers on the server. Silence. Blank screen. Hmmmmm. Grumpy-tech unplugs the power and tries again. The front display turns orange and shows a memory error. Hmmmmm. Grumpy-tech tries again. Processor error. Hmmmmm. Again. Processor error.

Panicky-tech starts formulating emergency run-the-school-with-no-data plan. Not very encouraging. Panicky-tech unhooks the 12,000 cables and hoists the 1,000-pound server on to the workbench. Panicky-tech pops the side off the server and unhooks the power from the card and reattaches it to the DVD player. Panicky-tech pulls out the firewire 800 card AND the extra USB card (just for good measure). Panicky-tech puts the side back on the server and heaves the 1,000-pound server back to the rack. Panicky-tech hooks up the 12,000 cables. Panicky tech suddenly remembers he works for a Christian school and prays really really hard. Panicky-tech powers the server back on. Beep. Green lights. Screen comes on.

Relieved-tech looks at the clock – 7:40 am, 10 minutes after students arrive. The server still has no good backup solution. Server:1, Relieved-tech:0

(I’m still VERY grateful the server came back online!)